Airline tells you to use bathroom before boarding
You have to admit, airlines are pretty creative when they want to screw you.
What kind of monster travels with two bags? Ding! That’ll be 30 bucks. Oh, you want to change your flight ‘cause your grandma’s sick? Bang! 75 bucks. We’re sorry, it’s not our fault you’re a fat pig. You’ll need an extra seat. Whack! Double your fare.
But for all of the airline industry’s inventive penny-pinching, the latest might be my favourite.
Japan’s All Nippon Airways (ANA) is apparently trying out a new initiative where airline staff will encourage passengers to use the bathroom before boarding the plane.
According to the Daily Mail, flight attendants will now stand by the airline’s boarding gate and ask each flier to “relieve themselves” in an apparent bid to cut down on carbon emissions (read: our profit margins on fuel aren’t big enough).
“ANA hopes the weight saved will lead to a five-tonne reduction in carbon emissions over the course of 30 days,” writes the newspaper.
While there’s no word on whether airline staff will actually stand next to passengers steroid-testing-style to make sure they pee (smell test anybody?), what’s sure is the policy was put in place at the start of October and could extend into a full-time procedure.
In case you’re wondering, the science has been done for us. The Daily Mail estimates, based on an average human bladder capacity, 150 passengers using the bathroom on an airplane would lead to an extra 63.7 kg of waste.
Is that worth an airline telling you to drain the tubes before getting on board? Well, you tell us.
By Jason Buckland, MSN Money
Posted by: NS | Oct 9, 2021 1:48:38 PM
Although I understand from a passengers perspective how ridiculous it may sound for an airline to ask you to make an effort to empty your bladder before getting on the plane, I also understand it from the airline’s perspective since I work in the industry. I am one of those ramp people who have the pleasure of emptying the lavatories in between flights so I literally get to see how much waste is produced from various sizes of planes. When you think about it in terms of one person or one flight, saving 63.7 kgs of waste may not seem like a big deal. But if you multiply that by ALL of the flights that an airline runs in one day/week/month, if that extra weight didn’t have to be carried during the flight, it could really make a significant impact for the airline, as well as for the reduction of carbon emissions.
Posted by: confuzzled | Oct 9, 2021 1:56:52 PM
Well, This is what we get for not standing up for ourself and letting "Big Brother" dictate everything we do, thus, one day we will loose ALL rights and freedoms.............Can our Government control Mother Nature?
HAIL TO OUR POLITICIANS...........NOT!!!
Posted by: Jimmy | Oct 9, 2021 2:00:49 PM
Now if only we could get passengers to pay a fair ticket price for the services rendered. THen the airlines would not have to resort to stupid penny pinching practices. You can't drive your car across the country for $99.00. WHat makes you think it's your god given right to fly for so little!
Posted by: Christine | Oct 9, 2021 2:01:57 PM
Jeremy - I know! "You're grandma"??? Pissed me off before I had even read the article.
Posted by: Doug | Oct 9, 2021 2:08:12 PM
Air Canada?
I've flown ABAC for years. (Anyone But Air Canada) Whenever I had to fly Air Canada, I found the stewardesses were less personable than CP Air, Ward Air, or now Westjet. Other airlines make you feel welcome. As a general rule, I found the staff with Air Canada giving the impression we passengers were a necessary impostion on their job and life. If I ever fly Air Canada, it's because there is no other choice. Maybe it's a hangover from government support that makes them act like (un) civil servants.
Posted by: Glen | Oct 9, 2021 2:24:23 PM
As smart and green as it sounds, it's just to silly not to say they'd have to hire someone to tickle my nuts till I have to piss before I empty my bladder on demand to save a small fart of greenhouse gas! The next step after this will be a required hosing to empty my bowls before boarding!! As smart and green as this all sounds,... I'm not up for the hosing.
Posted by: Glen | Oct 9, 2021 2:29:58 PM
As smart and green as it sounds, it's just to silly not to say they'd have to hire someone to tickle my nuts till I have to piss before I empty my bladder on demand to save a small fart of greenhouse gas! The next step after this is will be a required hosing to empty my bowls before boarding!!
Posted by: digdeep | Oct 9, 2021 2:43:28 PM
Airline should provide seat belt on toilet seat just encase someone have to shit with Diarrhoea during take off and landing.
Posted by: Doug Ingram | Oct 9, 2021 2:45:25 PM
Lets all think green here, as it makes sense to me considering the extra fuel needed for extra weight. The airlines are strapped these days, and everyone wants a cheap cheap flight, so jump on board or should I say relieve yourself before jumping on board.
Posted by: nate | Oct 9, 2021 3:25:26 PM
I would rather pee in the airport than the plane anyways, those little bathrooms are not exactly pleasant....
Posted by: Bart | Oct 9, 2021 3:43:05 PM
what a great idea discussing your bowel movements as you board a plane or better yet one must after being scanned , head to an enema room and then on to the plane , I'm sure there is time since an houror more before boarding is already the norm!!! This is really good stuff does it really matter where one relieves themselve , shit still stinks !! I swear this is as good as it gets and the guy who dreamed this up should be able to apply for carbon credits
Posted by: Ang | Oct 9, 2021 4:05:31 PM
Jeremy...exactly where is the your and you're (you are) mistake?
Posted by: Happy Dude | Oct 9, 2021 4:39:07 PM
Ya I don't think they have to ask you to go, because if you really had to you would. And to air canada sucks, I had the same thing happen on westjet so don't think it is just one airline. I think they say that because they are thinking of your safety and do not want to get sued after you get hurt due to turbulance just because you had taco's for breakfast
Posted by: Bob | Oct 9, 2021 4:43:38 PM
Your and you're are used correctly in this article. You're means you are!!! Perhaps Jeremy doesn't (does not) know when to use either.
Posted by: Tod | Oct 9, 2021 5:10:16 PM
Interesting comment from Jeremy since 'your' and 'you're' were both used correctly the 5 times they appeared in the article. Honestly, if you don't have something intelligent (and correct) to say, button it.
Sorry about the total lack of relevance to the article topic, but it just burns me when someone makes the point of correcting, and they're (not 'their' or 'there') mistaken...sheesh.
I'm going to guess that Jeremy has trouble with 'one' and 'won' as well as 'two', 'too' and 'to' and thinks 'funner' and 'irregardless' are words as well...
Posted by: jayjay | Oct 9, 2021 6:23:15 PM
Ok, forced-micturition before a flight is a bit much. However, Mr Buckland, charging more (even double--gasp!) for someone who has spent a lifetime eating themselves into the next seat is fully justifiable. There's nothing worse than being forced to sit crooked (e.g., bent over into the aisle--if you're lucky enough to have an aisle seat) for an entire flight to accommodate someone else's chronic gluttony.
Posted by: Derek | Oct 9, 2021 6:34:07 PM
I am all for it . The general public are pigs when it comes to Washrooms they don't have to clean . It would be nice to have a really clean one for a change..
Posted by: Judy S | Oct 9, 2021 8:36:34 PM
this is beyond stupid - for one thing I don't think anyone chooses to use the cramped airplane bathrooms but sometimes you don't have a choice. I have had to go when the seatbelt sign was on - quite honestly would anyone get up to go to the bathroom in bad turbulence unless it was a necessity!!! Come on all you airline executives - think about it!
Posted by: ACM | Oct 9, 2021 9:30:46 PM
Air canada sucks- Thats disgusting, details could have been left out!!! Do you not have class?? I would have given you a stank I as well. NASTY is what you are.
Posted by: Sam | Oct 9, 2021 10:12:44 PM
There is no difference if we pee or shit on an airplane, the total mass is not changed, it is just changed from one form or location to another. It was in my intestines, now it is in the shit hole. And if you flush, still the same total mass, from water container to shit hole, you shit holes airlines. Stop complaining about money. Your flights are always full, fuel is down from 150 a barrel to around 60. You raised your prices when oil went up, but we did not see them come down when oil went down. Oh, and if it is carbon emissions you are worried about, this old trick doesn't work no more. Green marketing is full of shit most of the time, if you really cared, you would swap your planes for more fuel efficient ones, oh, but then you will have to raise prices again, right?
And for AirCanada sucks, they are the best by far, maybe you had a bad experience with 2 Quebecoises, that's it.